october_rosehip (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
october_rosehip) wrote2019-03-21 12:33 pm
october_rosehip) wrote2019-03-21 12:33 pm
Dream Friends
I'm told this isn't normal. I'm told we each only get one life and whatever our brain tells us at night is, at most, working out the problems of said life.
But this has not been my experience. My dreams have continuity. When I dream, I can remember other dreams, sometimes ones that I had forgotten in my waking state. I know I am dreaming, but that doesn't mean what's happening isn't REAL. I never think to myself "I could just wake up, this doesn't matter." Because in the moment I am convinced it DOES. I have woken up before the ending and been grieved by the loss. I would lever learn what happened unless I was lucky enough to return to that exact place in the future.
I have friends, in my dreams. Sometimes I return to them and sometimes I can't seem to. I've lived entire lives and I will tell you that waking up to find you do not have a horse/ lover/ child is uniquely painful.
I want to introduce you to my friends, and the only way to do that is to give them a second life in my art and writing but I am finding that this is a lot of responsibility. Emotionally, they are real to me. I want to tell you the truth of who they are. It would be so much easier to mine my dreams for ideas if I weren't so convinced they held a truth I don't want to lose in the telling.
But I want other people to know about the old man who lived in an underground forest who would sell you a light for a penny to keep you safe. I want the Elf Sister's unique love for the Silent One to reach other people, even though I don't quite know how that happened myself. A forgotten goddess told me that though the world is ending, things will be all right, that there are a lot more endings that happened before this one. How do you pass on the words of a god from your dreams without twisting them?
Are these even things for sharing? I feel like I should. I feel like I am told a great many things that would be good for others to hear. I just want to do it right.
But this has not been my experience. My dreams have continuity. When I dream, I can remember other dreams, sometimes ones that I had forgotten in my waking state. I know I am dreaming, but that doesn't mean what's happening isn't REAL. I never think to myself "I could just wake up, this doesn't matter." Because in the moment I am convinced it DOES. I have woken up before the ending and been grieved by the loss. I would lever learn what happened unless I was lucky enough to return to that exact place in the future.
I have friends, in my dreams. Sometimes I return to them and sometimes I can't seem to. I've lived entire lives and I will tell you that waking up to find you do not have a horse/ lover/ child is uniquely painful.
I want to introduce you to my friends, and the only way to do that is to give them a second life in my art and writing but I am finding that this is a lot of responsibility. Emotionally, they are real to me. I want to tell you the truth of who they are. It would be so much easier to mine my dreams for ideas if I weren't so convinced they held a truth I don't want to lose in the telling.
But I want other people to know about the old man who lived in an underground forest who would sell you a light for a penny to keep you safe. I want the Elf Sister's unique love for the Silent One to reach other people, even though I don't quite know how that happened myself. A forgotten goddess told me that though the world is ending, things will be all right, that there are a lot more endings that happened before this one. How do you pass on the words of a god from your dreams without twisting them?
Are these even things for sharing? I feel like I should. I feel like I am told a great many things that would be good for others to hear. I just want to do it right.